I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
