Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
