Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
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