Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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