I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
