Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
