Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
