I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
We had to coat check the pizza.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
