Say something about gay babies.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
