White coat. Heels.
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There r osticjed everywhere
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I stole a fireplace last night.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
