Dual....:-)
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
