well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
