Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
