You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
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