Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
