So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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