i just identified you from a description of your pipe
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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