Say something about gay babies.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
