Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
