So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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