I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
