I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Randomize
