If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize