no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
