If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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