i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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