what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
