I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
