I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
