I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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