Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
