Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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