So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
