Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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