I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
