so let's talk penis.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
