Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
