...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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