captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
