Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
