i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
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