Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
