Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize
