someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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