It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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