Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
