it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
