let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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