Porn is love you can see.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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