He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize